Internship Journal XI

We don’t need another hero

Perhaps we are not called to be heroes. In the past I’ve posted my thoughts about how I liked the show Smallville and the role of superman. I think that God is trying to tell me that if there is any hero for the church it isn’t me, it is Him. I don’t know how many people have the desire to be the one valiant soldier holding back the darkness so I don’t know how applicable my thoughts will be to most of the people that read this.

I’m finding that when I try to live up to the standard of hero I never quite do it. I always fail. I’m always disappointed. I’m often motivated by the state of the church and feel as though I’m somehow more responsible to fix things because I am one of the select few that are brave enough to acknowledge the problem. I have tied my self worth to this role and it has resulted in no small amount of pride at times. My lack of stunning success in my first formal ministry position (an internship) struck a hard blow to my ego. I felt worthless because I failed in my mission to be the people’s hero, God’s hero.

I’m starting to learn that my role is to be faithful to God. To be faithful with what He has given me. I am not expected to be a hero. I’m expected to let God work through me. I can be honest and acknowledge there are major problems, these things can stir inside me, but I must remember that the biggest difference I can make is when I’m yoked with the Lord.

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