The heart and the heartache


It doesn’t seem that long ago that I decided to join a family with one very difficult boy. Like many others I believed that this boy’s problems could be resolved with firm but loving consistent attention. My naivety became apparent early on. This boy had issues that went beyond normal parenting. After a full court press involving mental health professionals the results were very promising.

After a few life changes and environment changes things took a deep dark turn. I’ve encountered situations that I never thought I’d be involved in as a parent. Despite the efforts of a great many sincere people our son may not avoid the darkest of potential consequences. We are not without hope but after we’ve been through there isn’t much pride left.

This situation asks me “are you willing to love sacrificially and get heartache in return?” The truth is I am but at times I am heavily burdened with grief and sorrow. This is so very very hard. It has put some things in to perspective for me. What is love? What is ministry?

I was reading today about the good shepherd John 10. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. There is nothing in the story that says the sheep is always saved. There nothing about bragging about how many sheep you’ve saved or the accolades received for your “sacrificial” service. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.

This kind of love is the heart of Christ and it cannot be separated from the heartache.

  1. #1 by Linea on May 27, 2008 - 10:15 am

    What you say is so true – there is no guarantee that the sheep will be saved. We still must remain faithful and not lose hope. Keep loving him, it is the best antidote to all things that our kids struggle with that are beyond our comprehension.

  2. #2 by Hosehead on May 27, 2008 - 5:25 pm

    LT, know that you are loved by many of us who aren’t physically with you as well. I don’t know the struggle that you must be going through as a father. Know that we are praying for you and pray for your family to grow in love. If there is anything that we can help you with, please don’t hesitate to ask. Especially after reading “The Shack” I am struck by how much God teaches us about ourselves through our children. Isn’t it astounding that God still loves us despite how we act towards him? LT, you are a very special person who was brought to this family for a reason, they are your family. (This is rich coming from someone who loses patience with his own children too quickly). See you guys soon!

  3. #3 by beck on May 28, 2008 - 9:13 pm

    Awe. That sounds so painful. Take care you guys, I’m praying for you.

  4. #4 by Dave King on June 3, 2008 - 8:08 am

    Hugs, tears and prayers.

    - Peace

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